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I am now introducing our church to a broader audience through blogspot. Here is my first post there,

So it begins.

For those of you unfamiliar, I am the legendary Dr Zodiac. Mad Cult leader, Visionary, Mystic and Artist. For the last few years I have been gathering a core group of followers to assist me in spreading a new mental disease. A sense of true consciousness that the world needs to experience. A new spiritual vision, mixed with a simple set of political views. Designed to bring about a true nirvana on earth. All we ask in return is that you turn over most of your free thought and 5 percent of your income. Which is a bargain when you consider that most churches ask you to tithe 10 percent.

I see some of you balking at the mention at the loss of free thought. Allow me to ask though, how many of you are letting someone else do your thinking for you? Do you attend Glenn Beck University? Yell Ditto at that meathead Limbaugh or swear that every Olberman special commentary is the gods honest truth? Congrats, you are turning over your own ability for free thought to them.

The desire to be told what you want to hear is as old as time. Sadly now as much as then people will happily tell you what you want to hear simply to keep you from noticing that their hand is in your pocket and raiding your wallet.

So allow me to introduce you to the first sacrament of the Church of Zodiac. Designed by my head of Research and Dementia and approved by the High Priest himself. When confronted by the great talking head on TV you are to look, listen, actually understand the words the person is saying as they relate to your own life.

Then midway through what they are saying stand up and yell. “DO I LOOK LIKE I GIVE A FUCK?!!” More often then not in the midst of some compelling conspiracy theory about how some politician wants us all to become part of a (Fill in the blank) socialist/fascist/communist Adolf Hitler inspired socio economic disaster. The person telling this little tale needs to hear those words. Preferably very loudly and in his face.

If I may impost a moment of real truth here. The people who own the networks where these things are said have all ready made large campaign contributions to the party they are pissing and moaning about. These contributions have all ready derailed any real system of regulating financial derivatives, and the people who did the most damage to that legislation were democrats. (Senator Christopher Dodd has a lot to answer for here.) This may not be what you want to hear, but it is a small and important taste of an odd and vanishing species known as truth. A taste for it can and should be acquired, and a larger audience for it is the only thing that may save the world we reside on.

So with that in mind please feel free to look at the talking head on TV and announce “DO I LOOK LIKE I GIVE A FUCK?!” It won't fix anything but will clear your mind long enough for you to have a clear rational thought that is all your own. It will also vent the frustration you feel knowing you are being talked down and lied to constantly.

Next week we discuss the churches method of sin absolution. Prepare to smile your way to paradise!
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We all know the scene. The tornado rolls through the Oklahoma trailer park and leaves a path of carnage in it's wake. Then to add to the destruction the news crew arrives and finds not the young Doctoral candidate who had been living there to afford grad school. No instead they hunt down the lady with three working teeth and two functional brain cells wearing the T-shirt that reads"My daddy says I'm the best kisser in the county!" who while giving her rather bizzare take on events is precariously balancing a child on her hip and a Marlboro on her lips.

Needless to say it gives a rather slanted take on the victims of the disaster.

Much the same takes place in the religious marketplace of ideas. There are plenty of well spoken people out there who can hold a conversation without once invoking the destructive will YHVH or Allah, but they seem content to be heard from pulpits in small churches, mosques and temples around the world.

No instead what the world gets are videos of people claiming to represent the "True will of!" (Fill in the name of some diety who probably wishes these guys would STFU.) Proving once again that the loudest speaker is often the one furthest from the reality of any situation. In the world of religious thought these guys serve the same role as the Oklahoma spokescreature above. They make for entertaining television and create a rather artificial sense that the opinions they spout are becoming the mainstream of a very large belief system.

As I have said before I urge the members of my church to look beyond the infotainment state created for us, where generally poor ideas are sold as the next big thing, while truly great new ideas are not given an inch of column space or moment on TV because they don't fit into a sound bite. In the end the only way it will change is if we And I mean a whole bunch of us. Stop looking through their lens, and instead find sources of our own for true news and ideas.

Later I will put out a list of places to look, and I want to know where you and yours find your actual news.

Instead of the Oklahoma catastrofuck we are fed every day.
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My dear friends I have returned from an extended hiatus checking out my frontal lobes. Then cleaning out the residual trash hiding within. The usual stuff, foolish moments and guilt over things that are quite common and decent, but trained into us all to feel bad about.

So with that in mind I am going to throw out a few words on the subject of sin. The most obvious being an answer to the question often asked among the faithful. "Dr Zodaic, what is true sin?" Well my dear friend Lazurus Long quantified the true nature of sin in his notebooks. "Sin is a matter of harming a person for no good reason. Hurting yourself is not essentially sinful, but it is quite stupid." Now we all have good reasons to harm people. There have been moments when I thought kicking an old man in the ass as he went down a flight of stairs was a good idea and felt I had good reason. But then I remembered the twins would still be there in a couple of minutes and didn't do it. Why? Because the value of my soon to be good (No wait.. great) times didn't out weigh the nice (but very very slow) old man's tight to exist unharmed.

Which is where we get into the function of temptation in relation to evil. Evil masquerades often as the thing that will make us happiest right now. This why temptation is as interesting as it is. Foolish churches across the world tell us not to dwell to much on the things that tempt us, lest they lead us into evil.


To truly understand and resist the function of temptation one must understand it. Therefore it is best to dive into your psyche and understand the things that twinge your "I should know better" meter. Take some time to dwell on that thought that arouses and creeps you out at the same time. Take the moment to understand it, and therefore be ready to resist the truly dangerous temptations when they step into your way. I leave it to you to figure out what the truly dangerous temptations are. But when in doubt the advice of the MacManus brothers from the Boondock Saints can be a good starting guide.
"Do not Murder, Do not Steal, do not Rape these are codes that men of all faiths can hold dear." Then work out the subtleties as you go along, like any other truly thinking person.
Remember folks the focus of our church is not to create dogma to force you to live someone elses life. the purpose of this church is to free your mind so your ass can follow.

Now then I am off to get into what some might call trouble, talk amongst yourselves and don't wonder why your sister has that smile on her face. I might be the one responsible.
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Some mandatory reading.

A few of you have read it, others sadly have not. So it is now official. Illuminatus by Robert Anton Wilson and Robert Shea is now mandatory reading for all members of the church.

For those of you not informed by the book the plot is about the search for the truth on the Illuminati, and the idea that the search for the truth is in the end the point. As often the truth is both real and a lie at the same time.

The book is hard to read at first. Wisely the authors force you to learn how to think beyond the standard boundaries of time and location and learn how to think in a space that is uniquely yours. It is in point of fact a means of learning a mindset prepared to learn and accept magick, and truths behind it.

The philosophies within helped the good Doctor to form the concepts of the Church and the ensuing cult. It is a good introduction to several systems of non standard politics, and economy, and might make you think of new alternatives to the reality tunnels we all currently reside in.

Sadly both Wilson and Shea have passed but their words live on. Enough copies exist so that you can find them cleverly hidden in common bookstores or ones who carried use models as well. Go out and find a copy soonest and begin reading. The time for mind control through free thought is now.
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Ahh a cold day here in the big city. A typical day spent engaging the enemy in dark battles over the souls not yet claimed by some deity or another. Or else convincing those whose souls are currently pledged to come to our side through bribery and other means.

It's hard to miss as you walk through downtowns there days the number of homeless people shivering here and there wandering aimlessly. Knowing full well that their best hope for money comes in the form of day labor or uses less savory. Mixed among them the lost children either driven away or abandoned by their homes.

And it's moments like this as I st down and listen to how the Treasury department really can't keep track of the money they gave banks a few months ago to help “save our economy” that I realize something.

Our system does not work, and to be honest is simply a means of extending Feudalism through a semblance of democracy. The idea that we are building a strong economy by sending all the cash upward has to be one of the greatest propaganda coups of all time. Right behind the use of “family values” as a catch phrase. Never mind the fact that declining wages and benefits have forced parents to spend more and more time away from the home leaving their children to be raised by themselves and the insidious effects of a popular culture so venal as to be beyond description.

The system we have been using has been in effect for a few millenia in way shape or form or another. The exultation of a few at the expense of everyone else has run it's course. In an age of weapons of mass destruction it's now simply a matter of time before one of the few decides to indulge in the ultimate act of ego and uses those weapons to kick off the big finale'

So I call for a social revolution. It's time to reach for becoming better people rather then simply materially wealthy ones. Our world requires a broader base of people with more material comfort, because the lack of basic essentials for living is what drives far too many wars, mixed with the desire for the raw materials held by others.

So before I take to task the whole idea of what being better people is, or what a better world might be I ask you to tell me what you think should be improved and how.

Lay it on me, or else I make the decision by myself and we all know how that goes.
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So lets talk values shall we?

I know you're thinking, “Oh goody a sex mad power hungry weirdo is going to lecture me about values! Hey let me go get the cyanide for my tea.” Seriously wait and it will all make sense.

Values has been a buzzword in American politics for too long, like communism back in the cold war days it's become a word we all react to but very few seem to grasp any true meaning of it. So allow me to give it some. Or better yet define some values for our nascent church and soon world spanning revolution.

Lets start with sexual values. As I have mentioned I am a bit sex crazed, and the values of our church reflect that. For example absolution through orgasm has been a big hit and certainly put a smile or two on faces across the country. So lets examine our values sexually. Ready?
Is what you are doing consensual? Cool carry on. See that was simple. If you want to have hot gay bondage sex, knock yourself out, in the end what you do bothers me not in the least as long as you make sure to play nice with the people who consent to be with you. So therefore anyone trying to bring an anti gay plank to the church is a sinner and false prophet and will be shunned and eventually beaten with stones. (Cause I love irony)
Some half wit will no doubt mention the child issue as in how does this apply to children? Well after you poke them in the eyes and kick them in the shin remind them, Children pretty much by definition can't make an informed decision about these things so.. it's not consensual. Thanks for playing STFU.

Family values.
Hmm tricky stuff. How about this. Do you have a group of people you care for, and care for you? Congrats meet your new family. Now get to work defining how your relationship works. If it includes children their welfare should be at the top of your list.

The family values of the soon to be installed Zodiac world domination. I agree to the above. And will do all in my power to create an economic situation where people might spend time with their families. Therefore making sure that they're keeping an eye on the little skater,emo,industrial,hip hopping, soon to be driving on my streets, proto terrorists. And heaven forbid that they actually develop that dreaded thing known as a relationship with their kids. One where little junior might feel safe in asking the folks a few questions as opposed to getting pre programmed responses handed to their parents by Rush Limbaugh, or that half wit who should turn in his Irish last name. Remember folks in the end quality time is simply time. Even if it is just sitting there while the kid tries to learn an instrument or sport or do their homework. My job is to give you that time.

Cultural values. Boy this one is simple. Do you like the entertainment object on the glowie box? Change the channel if you don't, now move on. I will announce the saints list later this week, But three obvious ones are the holy trinity of Alice Cooper David Bowie and Marilyn Manson. All of whom knew the most basic way to get noticed, make the right kind of enemies and the world will beat a path to your door.
The right enemy is someone very loud, close minded, and with fanatical followers who will Tell EVERYONE just how terrible you are. And therefor help to sell tons of product for you.
Which by the way explains why it is I keep pissing on Bill Oreilly. I want him to mention me, and therefore drive millions into our camp. He is the right kind of enemy.
Then when we're done with him he will be put against a wall and mass ignored.

Go forth in peace and spread it around.
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50 Billion in fraud

Thats billion... with a "B"


Banks and investors require regulation.
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You know its hard to negotiate with alien governments to arrange for the big exodus when they discover that people on our world use arrogance and stupidity in a first strike capability.

Lets talk about arrogance. And to begin allow me to give a baseline. Japans economy tanked hard in the mid 90's. Banks crapped out, massive amounts of money was lost and many people lost their jobs overnight. I remember watching a scene where a Japanese bank president came on TV to formally apologize to his employees and the country. He was openly weeping and begging for people to hire his employees. I found out later that he killed himself later that night. Okay thats our baseline. A man walks in and apologizes admits his mistakes and take his own life in regret. (I don't condone suicide in most cases, but this was a matter of honor.)

Now then lets talk about John Thain, he's the CEO of what used to be Merill Lynch. As you may recall it to imploded spectacularly and had to be saved with a buyout from Bank of America. Now then for his excellent work, he would like to be rewarded with a 10 million dollar bonus. Yeah, I thought that too.
Over extend yourself in Credit Default Swaps, arrange billions in high risk variable rate mortgages, and then when the Whole house of cards collapses he would like an eight figure bonus for the work he did.

No asking people to hire the people that will lose their jobs over his “work”, no tears of remorse for making a huge disaster. Just “Hi I fucked up, give me some money.”

Heres my issue with American society folks. Our allegedly classless society lost the values of societies with caste systems. Thinks like Honor and Noblesse Oblige'. The idea that if you are in position of power then that position includes a moral responsibility to do whats right. Like for example trying to get your former workers jobs should your company take as a result of your actions.

Lets be honest here I might be a sex mad and power hungry monster of an alleged human being, but I do understand the need for a fair exchange. I may use your minds and bodies but in the end you also get a strong faith to believe in and a leader who wants to see you rich and fulfilled, as opposed to beaten down and debased. (If you are not a member of the church though you simply get used and debased, join now.)

So allow me to give an example of how the world will be when we are in control. In my world MR Thain would make his request and be sent to my office. Where he would be given his options.
1)quit now, take what you have and be glad I let you keep your skin.
2)You can have 10 million dollars no problem. Please have your family come to the nearest temple to become servants of the Church.
3)Theres a pistol in the next room. Do the honorable thing and I will make sure your family gets the ten million.
Should he take option one, he can leave after a sound beating and a few new tattoos.
I bet he'll take option 2. After which his kids will become well motivated bank regulators.
If he takes option 3 he will be made a national hero and his family gets the cash.

Coming soon. Lets talk values. Or it's about time we had some.
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Gone manic, back sometime.

Okay just so we can be done with it I have proclaimed a new sacrament and new holiday for the faithful of our mighty church.

Seeing as how people in the United States seem to have this reflexive need to “defend marriage”. I feel that in order to balance the scales and stir thought in the masses we must pick a day to attack it.

Now lets be real here I am not saying marriage is a bad thing, but the constant need by some to defend it is now reaching a fever pitch that is causing others to stop thinking rationally. This lack of rational thought has caused untold suffering here and abroad for years. As people far less scrupulous then I have used the need to defend marriage as a wedge to make people ignore trivial matters like wars, econmoic turmoil and lying on a level that a five year old would find obvious.

So my wonderful puppets I have decreed Dec 12 Destroy the Sanctity of Marriage day! Gather ye friends, and those close to you, or acquaintences that you have wanted to be close to for some time, and treat marriage like a well used sheet at a brothel. Have extra marital sex, throw in some group play, and perhaps indulge a few bi fantasies and sodomy. I do draw the line at beastiality for the celebration as that plays into our enemies hands.

Remember December 12. Give you and a few friends some early presents and give gifts that keep giving. Spread the love around enough and soon all sins are forgiven under the churches absolution through orgasm program. I figure in five years lingerie stores will be having sales the week prior to this day.

Now then onto our new sacrement.

When someone who wishes to defend marriage to the exclusion of all good sense, or answer a reasonable question about the lying piece of trash who ran this country for 8 years with a comment about people of other then hetero orientation. You must now ask yourself a simple question.

Look into your heart, and your pocketbook, and review how the sanctity of marriage, or Adam and Steve's proclivities effect you in a real way. To paraphrase Thomas Jefferson does it break your leg or pick your pocket?

If the answer is no, then you are commanded to say the most Holy of phrases.

Why should I give a fuck?

There say it. For 8 years, you've endured lies, bullshit, had your accounts ransacked by mad financial gurus and have been treated like a halfwit by people in Washington who can trace their success to their ability to get the vote of the most banal of us all. Now say it again, and keep saying it.

Why should I give a fuck?

It's our new sacrement, it doesn't absolve sins but it tends to keep you from falling into them.

Now go forth my children and spread the word.
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Lets be honest here, in some areas I am quite elite. Mentally, I am though power mad and sex crazed well trained in a number of areas, and capable of doing a number of tasks and making decisions in those realms. In others I could use some help. For example in the matter of putting blood back into someone, there I am absolutely helpless.

The function of the term elite has changed lately, well not lately, it's really taken it on the chin since a former actor and governor of California took office. Since then and for a little time prior in the popular culture the idea of actually being capable and functional has taken it on the chin.

Watch network TV for a while. But just a short time it might be catching. What do you see? People behaving in a manner best described by the word "duh" on sitcoms, and reality TV shows debasing themselves for brief fame and fortune. This folks, is the goal you are told to achieve. Or as my Dear friend J.R. Bob Dobbs once put it.
"Act like a dumbshit and they will treat you as an equal."

It's not like this everywhere thankfully. John Stewart comes on TV and makes a point of not treating you like an idiot every moment he has his face up there and actually encourages you to see past the BS endlessly paraded as entertainment or news before us.

We as a people should all strive to be elite. Very few will ever be Brain/Surgeon/nuclear physicist/Samurai/Rockstars. (Best to you BB!) Nut all have the capability to walk out there and truly rock some field or another with a capacity for greatness.

The trick is just figuring out what it might be. So I charge my flock with the following truly holy quest. Get out there and find your area, the thing that you will do to such a level that people will see you as l337. Or elite as those darn English using fools out there insist on saying. This is a church and movement for those who wish to lead their pakcs, not those who wish to spend their times watching "Flavor of Love"

Now then who wants to have some sin absolved.
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